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Is 4-5 years too big of an age gap for children?

14 votes
My 4 year old son is now in school and because of our finances we can now afford a second child.  With Angelo now in school I feel like it is time to try for another.  I was wondering if 5 years is too big a gap, are there things that I should worry about having children with ages so far apart.
asked in Kids by 2012amy (239 points)
I don't think an age gap is anything to worry about although, your concern tells me what a wonderful parent you are to your little one.  I think that a sibling is a good thing.  Older children will love to 'help' with the new arrival.  Wishing you the very best of joy.

10 Answers

6 votes
My two older brothers are 5 years & 9 years older than me.  I always had a great relationship with Kevin (9 years older)  He was very protective of me, he had to be because when I was younger I was tormented by my older brother Brian but as we grew up we matured and became great friends.  I dont think 4-5 years is a bad thing.
answered by Claire (196 points)
3 votes
You have to give them a little space.  Give yourself a break.  I never really understood shooting them out one after the other.
answered by Darcy (242 points)
4 votes
Our boys are 6 years appart.  The older one takes care of the younger and the younger one adores his older brother.  They fight once in a while but that is good for their social development.

I was the youngest of four kids and I got along best with my sister who was 6 years older. I think the age gap made for less competition.
answered by cmic (4,473 points)
edited by cmic
3 votes
They would give -up to us... rather than play hide & seek :)
answered by bcpotts (7,692 points)
reshown by AskMommy
3 votes
My oldest is 19, then 16, then 11 years old, then 23 months and finally my 6 month old!!!  Times can be demanding but whatever the age difference they all look out for one another...the 23 month old is always trying to help with the littlest one! :)  My 16 year old is the only girl and she's very social BUT the boys always are willing to help out...especially my 19 year old!  Be strong and healthy...and all will be matter what age gap?
answered by Chris666 (658 points)
You have an even bigger gap than me! My 5 sons are 23 months, 3yrs, 4.5yrs, 14 yrs and 17 yrs!
I feel you matter what the age gap it all comes down to FAMILY!  :)  I know for myself my child bearing years are now over and that we are complete...until grandchildren :)
2 votes
In my family there are some people 20 years apart.  Now that is too far of an age distance.
answered by Roberta (202 points)
4 votes
No not at all, 4-5 years is the preferred age gap for me.
answered by Karla (151 points)
1 vote
My brothers are 5 years apart and my husband and his brother are 5 years apart.  I don't see a problem with this age difference.  Best wishes to you.
answered by dikorory (3,334 points)
1 vote
I have 5 kids. There is 15 and a half years between my oldest and my youngest, so I don't think 4 or 5 years is a big deal at all.
answered by Andrea Amy (142 points)
0 votes
This is probably really late (I don't know how old this question is sorry) my brother and I are 5 years apart, there were a lot of fights between us as kids but as we got older we've gotten along really well, turned into great friends. Most people I know and people my mom knows all agree having kids 5 years apart is the worst in the beginning because your kids are at different points in their lives (ex: I was 14 going through my hormonal teenage girl years and my brother was 9, and hellbent on being a pertinent part to my social life...which caused a lot of arguments) but it all works out, if you are prepared to deal with potential arguments waiting around every corner then go for it, I would
answered by Jeckert316 (75 points)

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